posted by on Articles, Change, Change habits, Mindfulness, Stress

According to a recent survey, bad manners, telemarketing calls and getting stuck in traffic are near the top of the list for women’s top niggles. Other common niggles are, no toilet roll being left in the bathroom, being caught in the rain with no umbrella, missing a delivery and not finding things in your bag. I’m sure that most people can relate to some if not all of these niggles. The survey also found that in general women are niggled about 6 times a day and deal with niggles by having a cup of tea, counting to 10, visiting online forums, reading problem pages in magazines or self help books. They also talk to a friend or they find a coach to support them find solutions to the issues that they face. We all find ourselves faced with life’s little niggles from time to time, but it’s how we deal with them that’s important. If you see every niggle as a massive issue and let it get you down, small issues can turn into much larger ones very quickly and may have a negative effect on our health and wellbeing. Have you ever wondered how some people seem to take life in their stride and deal with their niggles as they come along? Here are some of my suggestions to help fix your niggles for good.

1. Learn from your mistakes – We all make mistakes but it’s how you deal with that’s important. If you can look upon them as learning opportunities rather than dwell on the negatives, you will be all the stronger for it.
2. Unhook from perfect – When you want everything to be perfect it can lead to continual disappointment with life. Small niggles can become big issues if you don’t watch out for your perfectionist side. You don’t have to be superwoman, give yourself permission to be human.
3. Try a new perspective – Recall a positive moment when things went well. What worked well for you that time? Build on your success in the new situation. Taking a step back from the situation and viewing the bigger picture can also help to evaluate your niggles. Ask yourself will it matter in the long run? Also having a role model can really help. When feeling unsure of what to do ask yourself what would your role model do in this situation?
4. Is your glass half empty? – Focus on the positive things in your life. We often tend to focus on the negative things. However, when we actively seek out the positive things we improve our outlook. According to positive psychology research how we choose to think, feel and act is a massive 40 percent of our potential for happiness. So instead of saying what’s wrong concentrate on what’s working.
5. Does your cup runneth over? – If your cup is overflowing and you feel over whelmed by what you have to do. Try a simple ‘to do list’ and prioritise your tasks in order of importance.
6. Be kind to yourself – Be your own best friend and treat yourself with kindness. Look after yourself. Have fun with friends. Slow down and try some simple mindfulness exercises to help keep yourself grounded. You can buy a mindfulness CD, get an app for your phone or find out more at
7. Gain control – How you feel and the way that you deal with situations is a choice. Ask yourself if there is something that you can change about the situation. If so, start exploring ways you can change the situation. We can’t change the past but we can build our future and by keeping a journal and reflecting and evaluating on what has happened we can make conscious decisions about how we might approach a similar situation in the future.
8. When you need uplift – When feeling that you lack confidence. Fake it till you make it and act as if you can. Your brain does not know the difference between actually doing something and acting as if you can do it. So pretending that you can do something releases the same chemicals in the brain as if you were actually confident at doing the thing that you want to achieve.
9. Do you measure up? – Know yourself, what are your strengths and areas for development. Do you live your life according you your values and understand your beliefs? By taking the time to find out more about yourself you will have no need to measure yourself against others. You will discover what you consider is worth standing up for and what is not.
10. Hook up – Develop your support networks. A friend can really help to lighten the load and a trouble shared is a trouble halved. If you are having a bad day with lots of niggles getting on your nerves, sometimes by simply smiling you generate your own positive energy which can soon catch on. Try smiling at others and you will find that they smile back and that you could have a much better day.
Bring a little ‘magic’ into your world, you are more powerful than you know. And if there is anything in your life that is not to your liking, you have the choice to change your mind about it. What we think is often what we do. Fix your niggles for good. Gain control and be a success. What are you waiting for!
Gillian Kitchen MA, ILM, is a personal & leadership coach find me on Twitter @changeagencynw & LinkedIn